Why DID the chicken cross the road???

[kitty-kat]

WHY DID THE CHICKEN CROSS THE ROAD?

BARACK OBAMA: The chicken crossed the road because it was time for a change!
The chicken wanted change!

JOHN MC CAIN: My friends, that chicken crossed the road because he recognized
the need to engage in cooperation and dialogue with all the chickens on the
other side of the road.

HILLARY CLINTON: When I was First Lady, I personally helped that little chicken
to cross the road. This experience makes me uniquely qualified to ensure - right
from Day One! - that every chicken in this country gets the chance it deserves
to cross the road. But then, this really isn't about me.

GEORGE W. BUSH: We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road. We
just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road, or not. The chicken
is either against us, or for us. There is no middle ground here.

DICK CHENEY: Where's my gun?

COLIN POWELL: Now to the left of the screen, you can clearly see the satellite
image of the chicken crossing the road.

BILL CLINTON: I did not cross the road with that chicken. What is your
definition of chicken?

AL GORE: I invented the chicken.

JOHN KERRY: Although I voted to let the chicken cross the road, I am now
against it! It was the wrong road to cross, and I was misled about the
chicken's intentions. I am not for it now, and will remain against it.

AL SHARPTON: Why are all the chickens white? We need some black chickens.

DR. PHIL: The problem we have here is that this chicken won't realize that
he must first deal with the problem on this side of the road before it goes
after the problem on the other side of the road... What we need to do is help
him realize how stupid he's acting by not taking on his current problems
before adding new problems.

OPRAH: Well, I understand that the chicken is having problems, which is why he
wants to cross this road so bad. So instead of having the chicken learn from his
mistakes and take falls, which is a part of life, I'm going to give this
chicken a car so that he can just drive across the road and not live his life
like the rest of the chickens.

NANCY GRACE: That chicken crossed the road because he's guilty! You can see
it in his eyes and the way he walks.

MARTHA STEWART: No one called me to warn me which way that chicken was going. I
had a standing order at the Farmer's Market to sell my eggs when the price
dropped to a certain level. No little bird gave me any insider information.

DR SEUSS: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Did he
cross it with a hare? Did he cross it with a bear? Did he check if the road was
hot? I kinda doubt it, I think not! Yes, the chicken crossed the road, but why
it crossed, I've not been told. Just one more thing I have to say, it's
been bugging me to this very day. If the Chicken is a she, why do we keep saying
HE?

ERNEST HEMINGWAY: To die in the rain, alone.

JERRY FALWELL: Because the chicken was gay! Can't you people see the plain
truth? That's why they call it the 'other side.' Yes, my friends,
that chicken is gay. And if you eat that chicken, you will become gay, too. I
say we boycott all chickens until we sort out this abomination that the liberal
media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like 'the other side.'
That chicken should not be crossing the road. It's as plain and as simple as
that.

GRANDPA: In my day we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Somebody
told us the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough.

BARBARA WALTERS: Isn't that interesting? In a few moments, we will be
listening to the chicken tell, for the first time, the heart warming story of
how it experienced a serious case of molting, and went on to accomplish its
lifelong dream of crossing the road.

ARISTOTLE: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

JOHN LENNON: Imagine all the chickens in the world crossing roads together, in
peace.

BILL GATES: I have just released eChicken2008, which will not only cross roads,
but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook.
Internet Explorer is an integral part of eChicken2008. This new platform is much
more stable and will never crash.

ALBERT EINSTEIN: Did the chicken really cross the road, or did the road move
beneath the chicken?

COLONEL SANDERS: You mean I missed one?

[Mugen]

To see his flatmate. See what I did there? Ohhhhh, yeah! Double entendre ownage.

[am0184]

Wow, very nice. you must have a lot of time on your hands.

[analogZero]

c'mon, occam's razor! you guys are thinking too hard.
he just wanted to get to the other side.
or maybe it was like that seinfeld episode where the chinese food delivery boundary ends on the other side of the street...chickens love fried rice, you know...

[suigintou]

I laughed at the Hemingway one. That's so true.

Nice Lennon reference, even if it's been beaten to death already.

[xXWENWENXx]

poor chicken..
it took so much stressing advice

[suune]

The chicken crossed the road because it felt like it and thought that many people would ask themselves why did it crossed the road...

[Russkie]

I "lol'd" at Dick Cheney.

[Waste]

The chicken crossed because he wanted to baffle generations of humans for the next eternity and a half. (The albert einstein one made me lol)

[LoKiWorlD]

hmmm....the chicken crossed the road to suicide bomb chick fil a.