Avoiding Bad Jokes- A Joke

[FoX66]

lol, nice. Here's one. A blonde and a Bernette walk toward a bar. The blond walks into it and the Bernette ducks.

[mszjay14]

check this out.....
One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck.

The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car.

He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle.

Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires.

The blonde started laughing.

This made the man angrier so he smashed her windshield.

This time the blonde laughed even harder.

Livid, the man broke all her windows and keyed her car.

The blonde is now laughing hysterically, so the truck driver asks her what's so funny.

The blonde giggles and replies, "When you weren't looking, I stepped out of the circle three times!"

[Amai-hime]

XD Those are great!

[Priness]

oH i GoT A JoKe!
oK THiS GUY, i WiLL CALL HiM BoB, WoKe UP oNE MoRNiNG ND HAD To Go PoTTY. HiS ToLieT WAz BRoKeN So He WeNT To THe reSTeRANT ACRoSS THe STReeT To USe THe BATHRooM. THe MeNS WAz BRoKe Too So He ASKeD THe MANAGeR iF He AN USe THe LADieS ND He SAiD "YeS JUST DoNT PReSS ANY BUTToNS." WeLL BoB WeNT iN ND SAT oN THe ToLieT. oN THe BACK oF THe STALL DooR WAz THoUSANDS oF BUTToNS. BoB CoULDNT ReSiT HiMSeLF ND STARTeD PReSSiNG ALL THe BUTToNS. ALL THAT WAz LeFT WAS A BiG ReD BUTToN THAT ReAD 'ATR'. oF CoURSe He PReSSeD THe BUTToN. NeXT THiNG He KNoWS HeS WAKiNG UP iN THe HoSPiTAL ASKiN THe DoCToR WHAT HAPPeNeD. THe DoCTo RePLieD "YoU PReSSeD THe ATR BUTTon DiDNT YoU?" BoB SAiD "YeA...WHAT DoeS ATP STAND FoR ANYWAY?" THe DoToR RePLieD "AUToMATiC TAMPoN ReMoVeR"

[mszjay14]

ohhh mann...if that was acutally sumthing that actually happened....he wudn't be able 2 have kids....lol

[Priness]

Originally Posted by mszjay14

ohhh mann...if that was acutally sumthing that actually happened....he wudn't be able 2 have kids....lol

LoL THANx

[mszjay14]

Check this out! it's really funny!!

It was at the end of the school year, and a kindergarten teacher was receiving gifts from her pupils.
The florist's son handed her a gift. She shook it, held it overhead, and said, "I bet I know what it is. Some flowers." "
That's right" the boy said, "but how did you know?"
"Oh, just a wild guess," she said.
The next pupil was the candy shop owner's daughter.
The teacher held her gift overhead, shook it, and said, "I bet I can guess what it is. A box of sweets."
"That's right, but how did you know?" asked the girl.
"Oh, just a wild guess," said the teacher.
The next gift was from the son of the liquor store owner. The teacher held the package overhead, but it was leaking. She touched a drop of the leakage with her finger and touched it to her tongue.
"Is it wine?" she asked.
"No," the boy replied, with some excitement.
The teacher repeated the process, taking a larger drop of the leakage to her tongue.
"Is it champagne?" she asked.
"No," the boy replied, with more excitement.
The teacher took one more taste before declaring, "I give up, what is it?"
With great glee, the boy replied, "It's a puppy!"

[spingo]

ur 1st 1 was funy but not the second :(

[Priness]

LMAo WoW THATS FUNNY!

[mszjay14]

OK WUT ABOUT THIS ONE?

The baby quiz

Q: I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move?
A: With any luck, right after he finishes college.

Q: How will I know if my vomiting is morning sickness or the flu?
A: If it's the flu, you'll get better.

Q: What is the most common pregnancy craving?
A: For men to be the ones who get pregnant.

Q: What is the most reliable method to determine a baby's sex?
A: Childbirth.

Q: The more pregnant I get, the more often strangers smile at me. Why?
A: 'Cause you're fatter than they are.

Q: My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes she's borderline irrational.
A: So what's your question?

Q: How long is the average woman in labor?
A: Whatever she says divided by two.

Q: My childbirth instructor says it's not pain I'll feel during labor, but pressure. Is she right?
A: Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current.

Q: Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room while my wife is in labor?
A: Not unless the word "alimony" means anything to you.

Q: Does pregnancy cause hemorrhoids?
A: Pregnancy causes anything you want to blame it for.

Q: Do I have to have a baby shower?
A: Not if you change the baby's diaper very quickly.

Q: Our baby was born last week. When will my wife begin to feel and act normal again?
A: When the kids are in college.

Q: Should I have a baby after 35?
A: No, 35 children is enough.