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stanmarsh
09-25-2008, 11:38 PM
hey this is a poem i wrote tell me wat u think plz be nice
As i lay dying
My eyes sore from crying
I feel i lived my life in vain
Yet everyday i feel this pain
My life full of endless fears
To much time spent on useless tears
And with that my life will end
I'll die alone all hate no friend
justblazze
09-25-2008, 11:58 PM
i like it it was ok
stanmarsh
09-26-2008, 12:01 AM
it was my frist attempt at poetry
KiriJolith
09-26-2008, 03:19 PM
Eh, it was pretty good. The topic of death and sadness though is way overdone. Maybe if you try doing a poem over a subject that you like it might be better? just a suggestion.
Mr.Mystery
09-29-2008, 05:58 AM
It was a decent attempt. Could use a bit of work though. And Yes... Death is an over done topic. Try something new. =]
DARKSYSTEM
09-29-2008, 08:27 AM
it was a good poem
i like it
zato
09-29-2008, 11:26 AM
stanmarsh, it's excellent a bit darkish but cool .. it's really deep ;) good work !!!
meraychan
09-29-2008, 12:55 PM
it's nice n cool...i like it..^_^ keep it up!!
stanmarsh
10-04-2008, 10:19 PM
thanks guyz :)
runt32a
10-06-2008, 01:36 AM
hey this is a poem i wrote tell me wat u think plz be nice
As i lay dying
My eyes sore from crying
I feel i lived my life in vain
Yet everyday i feel this pain
My life full of endless fears
To much time spent on useless tears
And with that my life will end
I'll die alone all hate no friend

wow thats great do you really feel like that at times
Russkie
10-06-2008, 01:40 AM
Does this mean I get to start making fun of you for being a cutter?

Awesome.
dog009
10-06-2008, 05:39 AM
I think is Great, I love this type of poems, So sad but so....(i forgot was i was going to say oh well) i like Edgar Allan Poe and Elizabet something but i guess who doesn't?
stanmarsh
10-06-2008, 08:42 PM
Dude i love Edger Allen Poe but Emily Dickenson is my favorite I love her poems there somthing i can relate to
bluedragon
10-08-2008, 04:56 PM
that happened to my friend she had a car accident and while she was laying down nobody help her she called me and i help her out............but i just meet the girl wat happened to her friends
lemonek
10-08-2008, 06:04 PM
It is sad, but yeah we always express what we have inside :)
Tsukiko
10-09-2008, 12:39 AM
Great job. I really enjoyed it.
Zieghart
10-30-2008, 10:25 PM
hey this is a poem i wrote tell me wat u think plz be nice
As i lay dying
My eyes sore from crying
I feel i lived my life in vain
Yet everyday i feel this pain
My life full of endless fears
To much time spent on useless tears
And with that my life will end
I'll die alone all hate no friend

I really really liked it!!!! :dancing:
Klay Vampy
11-07-2008, 01:02 AM
Great work Stan! I loved the poem. Dark, deep, and i can tell you put some of yourself in it. Good job. ^_^