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View Full Version : One of the "Wurst" criminals ever


Russkie
09-10-2008, 02:14 AM
A burglar who broke into a home just east of Fresno rubbed food seasoning over the body of one of two men as they slept in their rooms and then used an 8-inch sausage to whack the other man on the face and head before running out of the house, Fresno County sheriff's deputies said Saturday.

Lt. Ian Burrimond, describing the crime as one of the strangest he's ever heard of, said a suspect was found hiding in a nearby field a few minutes later and taken into custody on suspicion of residential robbery.

Deputies, he said, had no problem linking the suspect to the crime.

"It seems the guy ran out of the house wearing only a T-shirt, boxer shorts and socks, leaving behind his wallet with his ID," Burrimond said.

Arrested was Antonio Vasquez Jr., 21, of Fresno.

Burrimond said deputies headed to the victims' home in the 300 block of South Thompson Avenue near Kings Canyon Road shortly after 8 a.m. Saturday regarding a burglary in progress.

The victims, both farmworkers, told deputies they were awakened by a stranger applying "Pappy's Seasoning" to one of them and striking the other with a sausage.

Both the spices and the sausage, Burrimond said, reportedly were obtained from the victims' kitchen.

After the man fled, the victims discovered the home had been ransacked and that some money was taken, Burrimond said.

Burrimond said the money was recovered, but that the piece of sausage used in the attack was discarded by the suspect and eaten by a dog.

"That's right, the dog ate the weapon," Burrimond said.

"I tell you, this was one weird case."

Source: http://www.fresnobee.com/263/story/848554.html

Not only did I hear this on the radio yesterday, but I was reminded today by the NPO. There are not enough words in any language to describe how hard I laughed.

Credit goes to askanitherotund.

sousuke
09-10-2008, 02:18 AM
haha thats ruskkie if you never resorted to bombs

animex09
09-10-2008, 02:21 AM
WTF!!!!! that guy has a good sense of humor. i laughed so hard i almost pissed my pants

soulten
09-10-2008, 02:21 AM
I hope pappy doesn't get mad over the seasonings or the sausage.

Unknown
09-10-2008, 02:24 AM
Fresno..
I lol'd at the comments on that website.

atomsk
09-10-2008, 03:24 AM
a guy in new york robbed a china shop in the middle of the night. he couldnt find the cash register in the dark robbed the little change jar right next to the cash register. got away with *drum roll


35cents

Ryuuzaki
09-10-2008, 03:27 AM
A sausage? And why the hell did you apply seasonings to one guy? God damn that was funny.

analogZero
09-10-2008, 09:40 PM
wouldn't you apply the seasoning, then apply the sausage, then cook the sausage and make them eat it? wait that sounds crazy too.....hmmm. I'll just stick to laughing uncontrollably.