Chuck Norris Facts

[Klard]

Yes, I realize we have a thread dedicated to jokes, but it seems pretty dead to me. Also, I want to hear Chuck Norris Facts. So lay 'em on me.

1. Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

2. Chuck Norris does not go hunting. The word hunting infers the possibility of failure. Chuck goes killing.

3. Chuck Norris doesn't wear sunblock. The sun wears chuck block.

4. Several people were killed after Chuck Norris gave them the finger.

5. Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

6. Chuck Norris counted to infinity...
...twice.

7. Chuck Norris is 1/8 th Cherokee. This has nothing to do with ancestry, the man ate a f****** indian.

8. Chuck Norris once ate an entire ream of rice paper and shat out origami swans and Mister Miyagi from Karate Kid.

9. Crop Circles are Chuck Norris' way of telling the world that sometimes corn needs to lie the f*** down.

10. A handicapped parking sign does not signify that this spot is for handicapped people. It is actually in fact a warning that the spot belongs to Chuck Norris and you will be handicapped if you park there.

11. Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer.

12. When you open a can of whoop-ass, Chuck Norris jumps out.

[monsoon 10]

Chuck Norris told a joke to Chuck Norris once. Chuck Norris didn't laugh because Chuck Norris jokes aren't all that funny.

[Koopaking]

Billy Mays once met Chuck Norris and convinced him to buy a lifetime supply of Orange Glo.

[Klard]

Chuck Norris told a joke to Chuck Norris once. Chuck Norris didn't laugh because Chuck Norris jokes aren't all that funny.

Post something relevant or get out.

[Ryuuzaki]

http://www.animefuel.com/forum/showthread.php?t=2039&highlight=Chuck+Facts There's a bit more posted here.

[Klard]

Chuck Norris is the reason Waldo is hiding.

[monsoon 10]

Post something relevant or get out.

What are you talking about that is a legitimate Chuck Norris fact.

[Klard]

What are you talking about that is a legitimate Chuck Norris fact.

You know as well as I do that you enjoy random insults. That is as much a Chuck Norris fact as I'm an opera singer. How do I know? I have a website dedicated solely to chuck norris jokes as a reference.

[Koopaking]

Chuck Norris isn't in movies anymore because nowadays they film movies in Hi-Def. If you see Chuck Norris in HD, your eyes will bleed. So now he is in Total Gym commercials.

(I just came up with that one btw)

[Klard]

There are no disabled people; only people who have met Chuck Norris.

[Klard]

[QUOTE=monsoon 10;54029]What are things not to be proud of.[/QUOTE


Sticks and stones, sticks and stones.

[monsoon 10]

Sticks and stones, sticks and stones.

No double posting.

[Russkie]

If you can find a picture of Chuck Norris giving a zombie a "round house kick", then I will be a Chuck Norris fan.

Until then, I like Billy Mays.

[quietchat]

Chuck Norris jokes are so overused that he built a radar to find people who say them, and to automatically launch missles and bad guys to their homes.

[leerock89]

Chuck Norris isn't in movies anymore because nowadays they film movies in Hi-Def. If you see Chuck Norris in HD, your eyes will bleed. So now he is in Total Gym commercials.

(I just came up with that one btw)

OMG!! Dude points on the funny!!!!

[soulten]

Chuck Norris does not eat. Food understands that the only safe haven from Chuck Norris' fists is inside his own body.

[Koopaking]

Billy Mays invented gravity. He's such a good salesman, the universe bought it from him for 12 easy payments of $19.95.

[sousuke]

chuck norris has a fist in his beard instead of a chin

[1,000,000]

Really? People still think Chuck Norris facts are funny? I thought this virus finally died out

[puppetz]

chuck norris can slam a revolving door.

[sleeper101]

chuck norris sucks......... oops thats not a joke

[illuma]

chuck norris sucks......... oops thats not a joke

I agree the only reason i give him a little respect is because he was a student off Bruce Lee.

[monsoon 10]

Billy Mays invented gravity. He's such a good salesman, the universe bought it from him for 12 easy payments of $19.95.

http://images.encyclopediadramatica.com/images/2/25/BDK_Oxiclean.JPG

[Rincewind]

This was really funny 2 years ago when I played Wow a lot and I watched a lot of hes movies and Walker texas ranger ^^, he was also a topic at school for some time :O

Now its just boring .....:P