The Official Zombie Survival Guide

[Russkie]

The Official Zombie Survival Guide

Note: While most of these tips are strictly in reference to the event of a zombie Apocalypse, some tips cover all horror-movie-like scenarios.

1. Never investigate strange noises. Just go in the opposite direction. Especially if that strange sound is a blood-curdling scream.

2. Always have more than one firearm in case of misfire or running out of ammunition. Having a close-combat weapon is useful for those moments when you don't have time to reload, switch guns, or run out of ammo for both. Murphey's Law: If it can go wrong, it will. (This also means do NOT, under any circumstances, say "It can't get any worse.")

3. Be ready for all fighting scenarios (see above).

4. Be supplied. Non-perishable food, water, Tylenol. When the end of the world comes, I doubt anyone'll track you down for not paying for the stuff you get from a handy deserted store.

5. Never fight if you can run. Coward you may be, but a smart, living coward you will be.

6. Natural, animal instincts are important. "Morality" gets you killed. Be vicious, be ruthless.

7. Silence is your friend. Screaming/whining/whimpering/*****ing will do nothing but alert the zombies of your position, and make the people in your Survival Group want you dead.

8. Put a star by this one, because it's a biggie. Do NOT hesitate to shoot an infected human. Do NOT hesitate to shoot yourself if the worst should happen.

9. Know thine enemy. Know your zombie facts.

10. When running the **** away, do NOT look back. It's never a good sight and it slows you down. Note bene: Where you're running to is not as much an issue as what you are running away from

11. Always save one bullet for yourself. (See Rule 8.)

12. "Desperate times call for Desperate measures" is said by desperate people. When the zombies get here, consider yourself fairly desperate.

13. No place is safe; only safer. While being in a place with only one way out has its perks, it also means there will still only be one way out when the zombies come streaming through the door.

14. High ground = Your friend.

15. Shoot for the head. Anywhere else is a wasted bullet.

16. Sometimes, the few need to be sacrificed for the good of the many. If someone is acting foolishly and going to get everyone killed, ditch them. If there is no way you can help someone out of a tight spot without endangering more people, ditch them. If that person is just a dumbass, ditch them. The zombies get dumb and fat people first.

17. Have comfortable running atire. For your average citizen, this would include sturdy pants that would block zombie teeth but still allow mobility, t-shirt and a leather jacket, also for blocking zombie teeth. Always have comfortable running-the-****-away shoes. Wouldn't it suck to get caught by the zombies because you got a blister on your heel? (Side Note: Dress weather appropriate. Ex: Don't go out in t-shirt and shorts in the middle of winter. Seriously. That's just ****ing stupid.)

18. Know what kind of people you need to have in your "survive the Apocalypse" group. You need someone who knows how to treat injuries, someone who can lead/is intellegent, a resident gun-nut (we're set, there.) or brave, but not stupid-brave guy, the token MacGuyver-esque guy who can do everything with anything, and a few expendable people to let the zombies have when in a pinch. (Don't give the zombies a fat guy. Then you'll just have a fat zombie to deal with later.)

19. Do not go into the water. Do not drink the water.

20. NEVER assume what's chasing/attacking/whatever is gone or dead. Make that mistake and you are one dead mofo.

21. Mark this one with a star, it's another biggie. NEVER EVER EVER EVER volunteer for anything. Volunteering people die.

22. Never be first in line in a group. Lead people sometimes get picked off. But NEVER be last in line. The guys at the end of the line always get picked off.

23. Cross-training: Learn the important skills of your other group members, you never know when you could lose your Medic, your Gun Expert, or any other important member of your group. (As a note to this one: Save the important people. If the zombies are about to catch a dumb ****, let 'im go.)

24. Never rely on one person. Never rely on one weapon.

25. Never hole up somewhere with the intent to stay there forever. Always have a Plan B, and having a Plan C never hurts either.

26. Always take supplies when at all possible.

27. Everyday items can become lethal in the right hands. Knowing that flour or sawdust can be dangerous explosives, or that a knife tied to the end of a stick is better than just a knife or just a stick, may not get you much in a non-zombie riddled world, but once the brain-chompers show up, your stock just rose exponentially.

28. Always assume that an "empty" building has at least four zombies in it.

29. If you can see a zombie, it is far too close.

30. Know how to use weaponry, vehicles, planes and explosives.

31. Don't live off the hope that the army or whatever will save you. They are not your friends, but on the other hand, they are likely to be the only human organization still functioning.

32. Zombies can't swim, but they can walk and they don't breathe. Don't expect all islands to be safe.

33. Zombies may or may not need food. You do.

34. Get the **** out of Dodge. Never go back to see if it's better.

35. If Mom and Aunt Sally were at the store, they're dead. Your girlfriend across town is dead. Little Billy is dead. Stop being an emo and a/an hero and move on. Jesus.

36. Zombies may feed on other animals aside from humans, but only humans reanimate. Get that bullshit about animal zombies out of your mind.

37. Be prepared to forage and hunt for food. Cook all food thouroughly and boil your water. That's just normal germ-killing info. Seriously, how bad would it suck to get dysentry, cholera, or E. coli in the middle of the Zombie Apocalypse?

38. If at all possible, avoid traveling at night. People have a tendency to get nervous in the dark without a Zombie Apocalypse going on. Use your senses and good judgement.

39. Don't dick around by trying to scare people. Everyone's gonna be shitting their pants anyway; that crap will get you shot.

40. Zombies are no stronger then when they were alive. If you can't lift/push/punch through/etc something a zombie more then likely can't either. Remember that they also can't feel pain, so they can use their full power(but their muscles are also decaying). However, the longer zombies remain active, the better chance you have. Excersise tears muscles slightly, but cellular regeneration patches things up quickly. Zombies have no cellular regeneration, seeing as they are dead. Kinda.

41. Zombies tend to move in packs. If you find one zombie, there are more than likely more around. They will outnumber you. Do not try to decieve yourself of that fact.

42. Always have someone on guard duty. If you fall asleep on guard duty, it's the death penalty.

43. If you are unlucky enough to be stuck with a non-believer in your group ("It's not real" or "God will take time out from His busy schedule running the Universe to save our sorry asses"), either convert them really fast, or ditch them (Beating to death or feeding them to the monsters/zombies is also acceptable.). And as a side note, it's been scientifically proven by the sikrit zombie survival people (Read: Mary and Arcades) that non-believers attract zombies like honey attracts flies. Make of it what you will.

44. Don't trust random gangs of kids in malls. Or emo-kids. Especially emo-kids. Seriously.


Note on Cemetaries: Verdict is in. If the zombies are true undeads, stay the **** away from cemetaries. If it's "virus-style" zombies, they are okay. However, they're generally thought of as a bad place to be due to poor lighting and the general uneasiness cemetaries bring to your average person. Last thing you need is to be excessively jumpy during the zombie Apocalypse.


The information above is a guide to successfully survive during the inevitable zombie apocalypse. Its my job to warn you all, I hope this information helps you survive longer than the idiots who didn't read this guide and turned into zombies.

(Written by Mary the Fantabulous)

[Mugen]

I got a better guide!

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=ZnNIs4YKtZM

[tripletres]

Whooo... thanks for that man! i was busy trying to convert the fat idiot who cant do anything adn wants to rest in empty buildings, which apearently have at least four zombies, and i was always looking over my shoulder for animal zombies. now i know to kill the idiot and there are no animal zombies.

[atomicwarz]

http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=VZcSSm8U_BE

the masters at work

[Shigami]

So in order to have a certain number of zombie's inside a town,you need to have 1 zombie and a lot of human's to begin with.
And since zombie's dont have any more power than an ordinary human according to you,then we can bite them as well..
So it's like hundrents of people against 1 zombie..Tough time for the zombie huh?

[Muse]

I doubt I will ever be able to remember that LOL

[Raven]

So in order to have a certain number of zombie's inside a town,you need to have 1 zombie and a lot of human's to begin with.
And since zombie's dont have any more power than an ordinary human according to you,then we can bite them as well..
So it's like hundrents of people against 1 zombie..Tough time for the zombie huh?

No, first people don't expect zombies to exsist which would allow the zombie to get close. Second of all, if the zombie bites you or transfers any bodily fluid to a human, that human will turn into a zombie. As for biting the zombie, consuming zombie flesh will kill you and if you don't actually eat the flesh, you will turn into a zombie.

[Rincewind]

LOL, cool mate, dunno how useful it will be when i start to play Left 4 Dead on my xbox360, there its the person with the biggest guns and happyest triggerfingers who survive :D

[Raven]

LOL, cool mate, dunno how useful it will be when i start to play Left 4 Dead on my xbox360, there its the person with the biggest guns and happyest triggerfingers who survive :D

That game looks awesome! Valve has to be one of the best game producers ever. I didn't know it came out for the xbox, how do you like it?

[Shigami]

That game looks awesome! Valve has to be one of the best game producers ever. I didn't know it came out for the xbox, how do you like it?

Actually it will be released for xbox and pc about the same time.Anyway,people do not believe in zombie's because .. Zombie's do not exist.And since i do know how virus in general work,i say that even if a zombie bite's you then you still have couple of day's left to live untill you become on yourself.Which basicly mean's you have enough time to kill the zombie and find the cure to save everyone.And how do you know that 'zombies' are not smart? If a virus is able to take over the human-body i'm certain that it will be capable enough to make the host use a weapon of some short,if not make it smarter than an actual human.

[Russkie]

Zombie's do not exist.

Not yet. But they will, sooner or later.

And since i do know how virus in general work,i say that even if a zombie bite's you then you still have couple of day's left to live untill you become on yourself.

You will probably have hours until you turn, which reminds me: If you do get bitten, let your group know, or at least one of them! Don't pretend you will get better and everything will be alright. That gets people killed.

Which basicly mean's you have enough time to kill the zombie and find the cure to save everyone.

There is no cure! And even if there was, how on earth would you find it? How would you get it? Remember, you have hours...

And how do you know that 'zombies' are not smart? If a virus is able to take over the human-body i'm certain that it will be capable enough to make the host use a weapon of some short,if not make it smarter than an actual human.

What part of "the living dead" do you missunderstand? They are dead! They only have the basic functions. Feeding happens to be one the most important to them fyi.

So in order to have a certain number of zombie's inside a town,you need to have 1 zombie and a lot of human's to begin with.

If the zombie apocalypse turns out to be started by a virus, then it wont just be one person who gets exposed, it will be many (100 thousand - 1 million, depending on the virus/ammount released). Especialy when it goes airborne.

And since zombie's dont have any more power than an ordinary human according to you,then we can bite them as well..

Are you stupid? Dont bite the zombies! Whats the matter with you?

So it's like hundrents of people against 1 zombie..Tough time for the zombie huh?

If the zombie apocalypse turns out to be started by a virus, then it wont just be one person who gets exposed, it will be many (100 thousand - 1 million, depending on the virus/ammount released). Especialy when it goes airborne.

[Shigami]

Not yet. But they will, sooner or later.?
How do you know >.>

There is no cure! And even if there was, how on earth would you find it? How would you get it? Remember, you have hours...? Remember,we have plenty of time untill they come,science will envolve rapidly.Anyhow,I'm pretty smart..when zombie's come,i'll be the top scientist by that time ^^.

What part of "the living dead" do you missunderstand? They are dead! They only have the basic functions. Feeding happens to be one the most important to them fyi.?

They are not dead,instead they are infected,living dead cannot exist.It defys the law's of nature.

If the zombie apocalypse turns out to be started by a virus, then it wont just be one person who gets exposed, it will be many (100 thousand - 1 million, depending on the virus/ammount released). Especialy when it goes airborne.?

True that,my bad

Are you stupid? Dont bite the zombies! Whats the matter with you?
If you get eaten alive,you may as well bite it

[Russkie]

How do you know >.>

I know all.

I'm pretty smart..when zombie's come,i'll be the top scientist by that time.

*Gasp!* You're the one who will create the virus in the first place! Monster!

They are not dead,instead they are infected,living dead cannot exist.It defys the law's of nature.

Not true, they are dead. The virus kills you, then re-animates your body. Dont you watch the movies?

If you get eaten alive,you may as well bite it

No, what you do is you shoot it. Or, if you like me, you will wear a bomb vest (during the Apocalypse) for such an occasion. That way, when you've run out of ammo, you have no where else to run, and your surrounded by the zombie hordes: You take as many with you as you can.

I'm not going to let myself become a zombie, are you?

[atomicwarz]

sarge will. he will infect himself knowingly and lock him and grif in a room just to kill him. the sick bastard lol

[Raven]

sarge will. he will infect himself knowingly and lock him and grif in a room just to kill him. the sick bastard lol

Haha XD
Now that is the first statement in this thread I can compleetly agree with!

[Russkie]

Haha XD
Now that is the first statement in this thread I can compleetly agree with!


When the metaphorical poo hits the metaphorical fan resulting in the not-so-metaphorical Zombie Apocalypse, you will all believe me.

[tennis]

This guide is rather amusing. Kill the fat people lol. So mean...

[Shigami]

~It just make's me wonder one thing.We agreed that when you get bitten by zombies you,actually still have some hours/days before you turn into one of em'.In the movies,zombies tend to eat their victim,therefore it cannot turn into one since it's already dead.Indeed the virus will in fact re-animate you're body accordingly,but in order to do so,it needs you to be alive,or else how will it re-animeate you're DNA..

[Russkie]

~It just make's me wonder one thing.We agreed that when you get bitten by zombies you,actually still have some hours/days before you turn into one of em'.In the movies,zombies tend to eat their victim,therefore it cannot turn into one since it's already dead.Indeed the virus will in fact re-animate you're body accordingly,but in order to do so,it needs you to be alive,or else how will it re-animeate you're DNA..


No, no, no! They don't eat all of you obviously, so there will still be enough body part (most of the time) to properly function when you rise again as an undead.

You can and will turn into another zombie if you have been bitten, thats just how it works. The virus will go into your blood stream the moment you get bitten or scratched, make you very sick, kill you, and then will reanimate you body AND your brain... This is why headshots are so vital, it stops all communication going from the brain to the body and back.

It does not need you to be alive to reanimate you! Thats why it kills you in the first place. Dont you know anything about deadly viruses?

[Shigami]

No, no, no! They don't eat all of you obviously, so there will still be enough body part (most of the time) to properly function when you rise again as an undead.

You can and will turn into another zombie if you have been bitten, thats just how it works. The virus will go into your blood stream the moment you get bitten or scratched, make you very sick, kill you, and then will reanimate you body AND your brain... This is why headshots are so vital, it stops all communication going from the brain to the body and back.

It does not need you to be alive to reanimate you! Thats why it kills you in the first place. Dont you know anything about deadly viruses?

A dead human body is nothing more than a useless matterial.So you are saying a virus can take over an un-dead? That mean's the virus can take over a chair? or a couch .. Or even a fridge!! What a freaking power..
Seriously now,that's defying the law's of nature.A virus can only take over an Alive creature,not a dead one..How is it even going to make the body move if it doesn't have an functional brain,and to begin with the muscles doesn't work either.It indeed can re-animate but it can't create it from scratch,so in order to become a zombie,you still need to be alive.

This is why headshots are so vital, it stops all communication going from the brain to the body and back


~Yeah that's what im trying to say.If the brain is shot,which means if it is dead,the zombies sieze to exist.

[Raven]

Ok, Shigami, let me see if I can clarify a few things.
1. Zombies will actually consume a human. The deal is, when there are numerous targets a zombie is only atracted to one person untill they ceace to be "amusing". This means that many people will be bitten but not compleetly eaten. However, if there is only one target, zombies will stop and consume the body. This is also interesting because zombies do not process food, a gorged zombie's stomach will generally burst open causing them to be even more grotesque and frightening.
2. The virus can not animate a body that was dead before it entered. Zombies do not need to breath, pump blood, or feel like a human does. That is why they are called "dead". The virus itself shuts down all normal human functions after entering the body, and only after these functions cease can the body be reanimated. This is why after a period of severe illness a person will actually go comatose before becoming a zombie.

[Russkie]

Ok, Shigami, let me see if I can clarify a few things.
1. Zombies will actually consume a human. The deal is, when there are numerous targets a zombie is only atracted to one person untill they ceace to be "amusing". This means that many people will be bitten but not compleetly eaten. However, if there is only one target, zombies will stop and consume the body. This is also interesting because zombies do not process food, a gorged zombie's stomach will generally burst open causing them to be even more grotesque and frightening.
2. The virus can not animate a body that was dead before it entered. Zombies do not need to breath, pump blood, or feel like a human does. That is why they are called "dead". The virus itself shuts down all normal human functions after entering the body, and only after these functions cease can the body be reanimated. This is why after a period of severe illness a person will actually go comatose before becoming a zombie.


I agree with most of what your saying, but that one part; there is alot of debate about that right there. Some think and say that the virus can infect you and turn you into a zombie even if you aleady died prior to the virus even being there.

Others think that for the virus to be affective, it needs to flow through your blood stream and infect your body. It cant do that if your blood isnt flowing, right?

I personaly am open to any ideas on this arguement. Sure, I've fought a few zombie hordes here and there, but nothing major. I've only shown up for the actual fighting, but never in time to see the process take place. And as you can tell, I have always been able to successfuly contained the outbreak. But I assure you, one of these days I wont be so lucky. Have a zombie plan!!!

[Mugen]

How do we know if zombies will act the way they are portrayed? They may be able to walk faster than they do, they may be able to more simple tasks like open doors, walk up stairs without crawling...

[Russkie]

A dead human body is nothing more than a useless matterial.So you are saying a virus can take over an un-dead? That mean's the virus can take over a chair? or a couch .. Or even a fridge!! What a freaking power..
Seriously now,that's defying the law's of nature.A virus can only take over an Alive creature,not a dead one..How is it even going to make the body move if it doesn't have an functional brain,and to begin with the muscles doesn't work either.It indeed can re-animate but it can't create it from scratch,so in order to become a zombie,you still need to be alive.

~Yeah that's what im trying to say.If the brain is shot,which means if it is dead,the zombies sieze to exist.

We're talking about once-living-things here! Not "couches" or "chairs". (And especialy not fridges, I already looted your fridge to stock up on supplies and prepare for the zombie apocalypse... sucker =P)

I never said anything about the virus taking over random objects... "Oh no, that rock is coming at me! Look out!". The guide said something about not being able to take over animals too, I am not sure if I agree with that. I say that if it has/had a brain, something to control the rest of the organism, then it can be reanimated.



How do we know if zombies will act the way they are portrayed? They may be able to walk faster than they do, they may be able to more simple tasks like open doors, walk up stairs without crawling...

If you push someone standing rather close to a ledge with enough force, what might happen? Well, they will most likely fall off the ledge.

This is nothing more than a hypothisis on how the dead (emphasis on dead) will react once they are reanimated.

People have died and come back to life before... I personaly know someone who has been technicaly dead for more than a minute. He does not have all of the speach he used to have, and in some cases, its much worse (loss of movement, ect).

[atomicwarz]

hmm... well if its a virus it can infect a dwead body of course. the viruse probably doesnt just float in your blood until it touches something, bacteria and virsuse move right? also, if a perason dies the virus can still keep alive in the body, even if it dead it still has the things in it it did when it was alive. so say a misquito gets the body. if it drinks the blood thatd make them carriers right? and in resident evil apocolypse they had fairly fast zombies sometimes. and the crows in the latest one were all infected by eating zombie flesh, but they still flew and all that okaay, so they must have had some resistance. and the dogs were zombified too. and since noone realy looked at zombies as an infection until residant evil for the most part, and the fact there is no real "undead" humn to stufy, itd be safe to assum,e anything if an outbreak occured. such as it traveling by air and making you sick and die that way, zombies being able to run as fast as an olympic sprinter, and of course the possibilities that headshots wont work, along with intelligence to the point of teamwork among zombies. and one final thing, if you act like a zombie and maybe cover yourself in zombie blood, will you realy be able to blend in?

p.s dont stock food in the fridge. who do you think will operate power plants? noone. so id say your best bet is on a ship with alot of food, fuel, and if your the science type, a lab. and some fishing gear for study subjects and ,if you find a cure, food. i dont think an oil rig would work since its immobile, requires more than just 1 person to operate, and also the fuel would need a refinery to make gasoline correct?

[suune]

Viruses are submicroscopic organisms that multiply ONLY in living cells... so, if you happen to be dead before some mad/bored/alzheimer-ish-but-does-not-want-to-admit-it/arrogant scientist who think he's God creates such a thing, you don't need to "feel guilty" because you might eat your best friend or something. And it also means that your friend or grandma that deceased long time ago can't eat you.

Since my friend is a bit stupid-ish I suggest one Zombie guid for those kind of people (the ones you will absolutely enjoy ditching):

1. Silence is good. VERY good.

2. Be Rambo. The more guns the better. Just not too much. You need to carry it around and run. Remember this: IT ALWAYS GETS WORS!

3. Be ready to kick some (dead) ass.

4. Happy-hour at all convenient stores! The take-all-you-can drive!

5. Run like you never ran before!

6. Selfishness is a must. Be a *****.

7. Shut the **** up!!! Blabbermouths-BEWARE! (if there are any left)

8. Be a man and kill it! Even if its you!

9. Zombie crazy game players are welcomed! VERY welcomed!

10. No eyes on the back, no need to look. (Too) curious people always gets it.

11. Russian rulet with one player only. You.

12. Polite persons with good manner do not exist. **** that.

13. Police stations and hospitals you MUST avoid... too many people...

14. People who "walk over the dead to get what thery want" will surely survive.

15. Head = life. No head, no problems.

16. Either them or you.

17. **** fashion! Biker/street/geek/sk8er styles are a MUST. High heals are dead.

18. Medic/doctor/nurse, Metal Gear Solid/Medal of Honor addicts, Einsteins, brave-not-stupid, handy-dandy persons are EVERYTHING! + the non-so-bright-popular-ones.

19. No swimming or diving. If it ain't in a can/closed bottle, don't brink it!

20. They are like bad habbits. You NEVER acutally get rid of them.

21. If you haven't volunteered before, DON'T start it now either.

22. First and last place sucks.

23. If you are too lazy to learn new stuff, you are done for. As said before: lazy people don't stand a chance. Nor the dumb ones.

24. The more the better. Humans and weapons ONLY.

25. Plan A never works. At least on films.
Plan B is something you absolutely MUST have.
C is also a good grade.
D an even better. You didn't fail.

26. Make sure dyou don't run out of cigars... or anything else.

27. The most thing that humans create are for destroying....remeber this well.

28. It's never empty.

29. Your never far enough.

30. Drivers license and Make-your-own-A-bomb set bought on e-bay from Middle East are a gift from heaven.

31. The army is never around when you actally need her. Really.

32. 20 square meters of land in the midddle of the Pacific with NOTHING on it is very welcomed. Zombies walk on the bottom of the ocean and can be crushed by the pressure. Knowledge of Physics is needed.

33. Anorexia and bulimia are death.

34. NO car is worth it. Especially without gas. (and it goes for ferrari too)

35. No wash-behind-your-ears-and-putt-on-a-sweater.
Wasn't your type anyways.
Who's little Billy?
You are the center of the world.

36. Humans are the only threat.

37. Forget the french kitchen! Who wants to have his meal half-alive anyway?

38. If you were meant to be restless at night, you would be a vampire.

39. Pranksters are in deep "mess".

40. Walking around in the fitness studio on a Zombie Apocalypse is a VERY bad idea.
Only pure living and healthy will regenerate. You don't see someone fall from the 14th floor and burry him after his leg is healed, do you?

41. There is always more. Deal with it.

42. One miss and your out. Seriously.

43. A cold-blooded rationalist is doomed.

44. Never trust someone who cryes because of some song. Romantic times are over. They need a head examination. If they still posses one.

[Shigami]

It's like suune said,a virus can only multiply itself by forcing a body's cell to produce more viruses,if the body is dead for quite a while *i'll explain later* the virus cannot multiply itself therefore can not infect any other bodys.

Now why i said for quite a while.Even if a body is dead,not all of his organs die immediatly.If a human dies,he's heart will still function for couple of hours *explains how there can be heart transplants*

[Russkie]

You pretty much took the guide I posted and said it in your own words, yes? I reconize several of those rules.

[shadowmaks]

I like this guild. I'm no expert but here goes.

Wouldn't it be better to use a close range weapon like a knife that has a staight edge or a screwdriver so that if you stab, it can slide out instead of getting stuck.

Wouldn't stabbing be better slashing?

If you are in a fairly "safe" place that the zombies can't get into, try to find a way to kill them without wasting ammo or anything needed so they don't end up swarming the area. For example, You are on the roof of the mall. Right now you and some others are safe and blocked off the entranced. There is a ladder leading to a pourch on one of the sides that the zombies can't reach but with a knife on a stick can. Stab them in the head.

This one is a question, Why is it that in some movies, the limping zombies catch up to the running people when there is a baracade. It takes like 2 minutes to take it down but they still catch up even when the people knew what was going on. Example, Land of the dead.

Also, if you or someone can't hit anything using a gun, don't use it than. Wasting ammo is one of the last things you want.

If you have a machine gun like an uzi, don't shoot like a maniac, use it like a giant pistal, 1 bullet in the head is all you need. Also, don't machine guns hold more bullets/ammo in the clips.

Hope some of this were okay! By the way, nice ideas that everyone is coming up with. "If your being bit, bite back!""What are you, an idiot!" Very funny!

[Russkie]

I like this guild. I'm no expert but here goes.

Wouldn't it be better to use a close range weapon like a knife that has a staight edge or a screwdriver so that if you stab, it can slide out instead of getting stuck.

Wouldn't stabbing be better slashing?

Rule #29: If you can see a zombie, it is far too close.

The reason for this, is try and minimize any chance of you getting bitten/scratched. Yes, you will have to fight here and there, but if at all possible, keep a good distance between you and the major cities (where most of the zombie hordes will be).



If you are in a fairly "safe" place that the zombies can't get into, try to find a way to kill them without wasting ammo or anything needed so they don't end up swarming the area. For example, You are on the roof of the mall. Right now you and some others are safe and blocked off the entranced. There is a ladder leading to a pourch on one of the sides that the zombies can't reach but with a knife on a stick can. Stab them in the head.

DO NOT STAY IN ONE AREA FOR TOO LONG! Unless its very easil to defend, (like a concrete fortress or a ship out just off the coast) then dont plan on having a permanent shelter. Zombies are attracted to noise... and brains... so they will eventualy come for you.



This one is a question, Why is it that in some movies, the limping zombies catch up to the running people when there is a baracade. It takes like 2 minutes to take it down but they still catch up even when the people knew what was going on. Example, Land of the dead.

Don't believe all of the movies, some are full of crap. The Resident Evil movies are my personal zombie bibles.



Also, if you or someone can't hit anything using a gun, don't use it than. Wasting ammo is one of the last things you want.

If you have a machine gun like an uzi, don't shoot like a maniac, use it like a giant pistal, 1 bullet in the head is all you need. Also, don't machine guns hold more bullets/ammo in the clips.

Hope some of this were okay! By the way, nice ideas that everyone is coming up with. "If your being bit, bite back!""What are you, an idiot!" Very funny!

I had a hard time understanding what you were saying here... I am not even going to bother.

[Raven]

Close range weapons are good to have, but you should hope you never have to use them. You can kill a zombie by thrusting, say a screwdriver, throught the eye or temple to destroy the brain. However, zombies have the advantage in close range situations and you run a serious risk of becoming infected. Killing from long range is always the best idea.

Stabbing is better than slashing as lond as you hit their head. Slashing will disable a zombie faster when you can only hit the body though it won't kill it (of course, if you can slice the head off in one swing that is helpfull too but the head will still try to bite you). Stabbing, as long as you hit the zombie in a critical location on the head, will allow you to pierce the skull and eradicate the threat.

While a rooftop is a good "safe" place, do not imagine that every enterance is zombie proof. Believing your fortress is impenatrable will cause your guard to be down when some zombie manages to get in. Though i do agree, if you find a "secure" location to operate from, taking them out one by one carefully and in broad daylight without wasting ammo, is a great idea.

First you must ask, are they the same zombies? Durring an outbreak you cannot assume the only zombies are chasing you from behind. Another property of zombies is that they are persistant and have unlimited stamina. They will continue to come after you until the get you or they fall apart. So while the heroes are running and have to stop for breath and supplies, the zombies just keep coming...

Agreed, if the world has turned to zombies, there won't be anyone making more bullets and even if you make your own, supplies are not unlimited; conserve ammo.
Talking is easy but in a real world situation, flipping that gun to full auto can be all too tempting. Also, for those who are not sharp-shooters, hitting the head every time can be difficult especially when you are distracted by the entire wave of zombies that are after you. I would recomend an M4 on burst fire mode. This will fire three bullets every time the trigger is pressed (this is only for mass attack situations, single fire mode is best for picking off lone zombies), this will better the chance you have of killing a zombie with each pull of the trigger and when fireing at head level, may even let you take out more than one zombie at a time.

[shadowmaks]

Thanks Raven and Russkie. There is one thing that I want to know. Since the so called virus is currently called a type of germ/bacteria, then can it be obtained and used to make a prevention, not cure. I mean something that can stop it from multipying so that if you're bit, then you don't become a zombie due the the virus. Dieing from the wound would be a different subject. Its just an idea so feel free to call it stupid or whatever. I just want to know if such a thing could be possiable.

[Russkie]

Thanks Raven and Russkie. There is one thing that I want to know. Since the so called virus is currently called a type of germ/bacteria, then can it be obtained and used to make a prevention, not cure. I mean something that can stop it from multipying so that if you're bit, then you don't become a zombie due the the virus. Dieing from the wound would be a different subject. Its just an idea so feel free to call it stupid or whatever. I just want to know if such a thing could be possiable.

It has been said somewhere in here (I think) that the "virus" is just a hypothisis on how the zombie apocalypse will start. We dont know for sure how or where it will start, we just know it will.

And it wont really matter how it starts either, what matters is how to stay alive long enough to come up with a plan to defeat the undead.

[shadowmaks]

Also, is it possiable to stop the virus from multipying by cuting it off from the rest of the body. I mean like your arm was bit and you (bravely) cut off the rest of the arm, like up to the solder. It would really depend on how fast the virus spreads but I just thought I should ask.

[Russkie]

Also, is it possiable to stop the virus from multipying by cuting it off from the rest of the body. I mean like your arm was bit and you (bravely) cut off the rest of the arm, like up to the solder. It would really depend on how fast the virus spreads but I just thought I should ask.


I may be wrong (and I hope I am), but I think once you have been infected; you're infected. Theres no going back, end it now or risk killing your team or maybe even a friend/loved one.

[Shigami]

I may be wrong (and I hope I am), but I think once you have been infected; you're infected. Theres no going back, end it now or risk killing your team or maybe even a friend/loved one.

Actually yeah,you are wrong.When a zombie bites you,it transferes The virus into you're body,And that 'virus',in order to take over you're body it need's some time to travel from within you're blood veins and into you're mind.It is true that you may have some time for the virus cover that distance,but don't wait too long..In fact,it may cover that distance within some minutes if not seconds.

[shadowmaks]

Russkie, you reply really fast. Why is it I come up with something after I posted the last thing?(please don't reply to what I just typed)


Anyway, people say that the more people there are the better. I think it depends.

If you are going to be moving around alot, a small group would be good so everyone can just quickly move to where ever they are going but a fire power will not be as great. In the other hand the less people there are the less noticable it will be and can run without banging agaist each other when running away. Also, if one the needed people dies, there is a less chance to find someone else in the group that can do the same thing.

A large group of people would be good if they are going to stay in a place and fortify it. Besides the more people there are the quicker things like building searching, ect becomes. Also, going back to the small groups to be sent as a seach and resue/find/gater outside the place group. Sadly, people have a higher chance to be able to be replaces by someone else if they die and zombie assults can be dealt with easier.

Thats what I think.
P.S. I like talking about zombies:)

[Russkie]

Russkie, you reply really fast. Why is it I come up with something after I posted the last thing?(please don't reply to what I just typed)


Anyway, people say that the more people there are the better. I think it depends.

If you are going to be moving around alot, a small group would be good so everyone can just quickly move to where ever they are going but a fire power will not be as great. In the other hand the less people there are the less noticable it will be and can run without banging agaist each other when running away. Also, if one the needed people dies, there is a less chance to find someone else in the group that can do the same thing.

A large group of people would be good if they are going to stay in a place and fortify it. Besides the more people there are the quicker things like building searching, ect becomes. Also, going back to the small groups to be sent as a seach and resue/find/gater outside the place group. Sadly, people have a higher chance to be able to be replaces by someone else if they die and zombie assults can be dealt with easier.

Thats what I think.
P.S. I like talking about zombies:)


You may or may not be in a large group of people. Infact, odds are you just might end up alone or a zombie (or both). But if you do manage to round up a team, make sure you make use of their knowledge. You never know when one of those highly valueable people die at the worst moment possible.

Try to find someone with medical skills, someone with weapon skills, someone with common knowledge, and someone who will lead the pack (if that isnt already you). I might even consider have a few expendable people, you know, incase you get stuck between a rock and a hard place? That way, while they munch on Mr. Dumbnut, you and the V.I.P's get out alive to live another day.

[Raven]

To add to what Russkie had to say; Make sure you also learn each others skills, just in case one of you is recruited into the ranks of the dead.
I personally would say that small groups are better. A large group is not bad but can function better if it is split into smaller groups. It would be best for a large number of small groups to work together.

[Russkie]

To add to what Russkie had to say; Make sure you also learn each others skills, just in case one of you is recruited into the ranks of the dead.
I personally would say that small groups are better. A large group is not bad but can function better if it is split into smaller groups. It would be best for a large number of small groups to work together.

I hope I run into you during the zombie apocalypse raven... you seem like you understand this zombie business rather well. Just dont turn into a zombie... that would be very bad, very bad indeed.

[Raven]

I hope I run into you during the zombie apocalypse raven... you seem like you understand this zombie business rather well. Just dont turn into a zombie... that would be very bad, very bad indeed.

Haha, thanks ;) I'll be keeping my eyes peeled for you as well, zombie or no!
:dead::dead::dead::dead::dead: <--zombies me--->:lightsaber:

[Russkie]

I will be the guy with all the M1A1 Abram tanks at his disposal...

[Raven]

I'll be the guy running the oil rig with a small fleet of ships to transport and fuel your gas guzzling little tanks^^

[Russkie]

I'll be the guy running the oil rig with a small fleet of ships to transport and fuel your gas guzzling little tanks^^

There has been talk in the NPO about oil rigs out at sea... They seem to be a great place to be during the apocalypse. If you had controll of an oil rig, then you would only have to venture out for supplies when you get low. Sounds like a good plan, yes?

[shadowmaks]

It seems you and Raven are becoming good friends.

Anyway, heres a dum question. Is it possiable to fool the zombies? I mean zombies operate by using whatever little senses that have. Sight, Hearing, and Touch. See you, Hear you, and Rip you apart eating you. We can't do any thing with Hearing and Touch. Maybe with Sight we could well for start be in a location that has narrow halls and having a carpenter would really help with this. Otherwords, Build a wall and paint it to match the surrounding walls. The only problem would be to make sure zombies don't see you build it because they can still think and decifer even to a very little degree. Also having another way in and out would be needed. I know its hard to imagine but maybe it could be useful.

[Shigami]

Yeah and stay there for ever untill you melt,how smart

[shadowmaks]

I did said hard to imagine didn't I. I meant it to be in a place that you can stay a while, not forever. Anyway, it was only an idea. Sorry if it was only worth a throw in the garbage can.

[Shigami]

It's only a bad idea according to me..I just don't find staying in a room for a while interested..I'm more into exploring and travel more..Have contact with the outside world.And yes it could happen.

[shadowmaks]

Well I meant something like a mall or somewhere else thats large. Besides the original piont of that post was about fooling the zombies.

[shadowmaks]

Does anyone know when is the best time to use a weapon? For example, You are alone with only 2 pistols, 5 gernades, 1 shotgun, 1 uzi (machinegun), and a combat knife. When is the best situation to use what.

[SinXxX]

Why are people using pistol for zombies? I thought the best way to defeat them is to burn them or to explode them.

[leerock89]

I don't know. All I know is that if I become a zombie you better watch out cause I'm going to be an immortal zombie.

[Russkie]

It seems you and Raven are becoming good friends.

Anyway, heres a dum question. Is it possiable to fool the zombies? I mean zombies operate by using whatever little senses that have. Sight, Hearing, and Touch. See you, Hear you, and Rip you apart eating you. We can't do any thing with Hearing and Touch. Maybe with Sight we could well for start be in a location that has narrow halls and having a carpenter would really help with this. Otherwords, Build a wall and paint it to match the surrounding walls. The only problem would be to make sure zombies don't see you build it because they can still think and decifer even to a very little degree. Also having another way in and out would be needed. I know its hard to imagine but maybe it could be useful.

Again... they are dead, they have only the basic functions. Thinking and devising plans on how to eat you isnt one of them. It wouldnt be a great idea to spend you time on how to beat them mentaly seeing as they dont have any thoughts except "braaaains" to begin with.



Does anyone know when is the best time to use a weapon? For example, You are alone with only 2 pistols, 5 gernades, 1 shotgun, 1 uzi (machinegun), and a combat knife. When is the best situation to use what.

During the apocalypse, you will rely on YOU and your INSTINCTS the entire time, all the time. If you cant, you will end up dead - and maybe even your team of survivers. Your body and mind will know when to use your weapons at the right time (I hope).



Why are people using pistol for zombies? I thought the best way to defeat them is to burn them or to explode them.

The best way to kill a zombie is by stoping all brain activity. Yes, I know, I said zombies cant think - and thats true. But the reason they are are dead but can still move around is because of the signals the brain is sending to the body. If you stop the signals, then the zombie cant function, therefore fully dead again. SHOOT FOR THE HEAD OR ITS A WASTED BULLET!

[SinXxX]

The best way to kill a zombie is by stoping all brain activity. Yes, I know, I said zombies cant think - and thats true. But the reason they are are dead but can still move around is because of the signals the brain is sending to the body. If you stop the signals, then the zombie cant function, therefore fully dead again. SHOOT FOR THE HEAD OR ITS A WASTED BULLET!
I thought Zombies do not have brain activity and only moves because of the gas or supernaturals in their system. I learned something.

[shadowmaks]

I want to know why the virus only reanimates people. Animals also have the same internal system so it doesn't really make sense. Heck the dead soming back itself doesn't either but still. Also, what exacly moves the zombie. I'm still confused on that somewhat. I mean if the body comes back and functions somewhat, than does that mean the virus only reanimates the parts of the body like the muscles to move and whatever else is there. PLease explain a little about that. In another case, if the zombies don't breath so there isn't any air in them so how can they mourn. Also, some people think that zombies still retain some features from their past life. I mean habits like always going to the mall will lead that zombie to the mall they went to before.

[Russkie]

I want to know why the virus only reanimates people. Animals also have the same internal system so it doesn't really make sense. Heck the dead soming back itself doesn't either but still. Also, what exacly moves the zombie. I'm still confused on that somewhat. I mean if the body comes back and functions somewhat, than does that mean the virus only reanimates the parts of the body like the muscles to move and whatever else is there. PLease explain a little about that. In another case, if the zombies don't breath so there isn't any air in them so how can they mourn. Also, some people think that zombies still retain some features from their past life. I mean habits like always going to the mall will lead that zombie to the mall they went to before.

The zombie apocalypse has not happened YET, so I (and the NPO) do not know exactly how this works. We can only assume most of it, but we do know some facts.

I keep saying this, its the brain that sends the signals to the body to tell it what to do. Right now the activity in our brains is off the charts. We think, we know, we debate in our own minds what is and what is not. When you die, all activity stops. The virus re-awakens your brain, BUT ONLY TO A CERTAIN EXTENT.

I am not sure why the virus only affects humans. I did not write this guide (and I have said this), and I dont agree with everything it says, just the majority of it. Keep in mind that animals DO NOT have the same internal system as humans, so that may be part of it. I am still open to any idea as why the virus will only affect humans.

One last thing, THE VIRUS IS JUST A GUESS as to how the apocalypse will start. It could be started by a nuclear holocaust, or some weird parasite from the planet bob. It is just an assumption as to how it will all start out.

[Mugen]

Whoa, 6 pages about a fictional event which will never happen!!! That's right. I said it! It had to be said! I said it!

[milo]

Sweet zombies 27 plans of action

[Xunlai]

what would we do if it were something like I am legend, or 28 weeks later?

[Shigami]

I want to know why the virus only reanimates people. Animals also have the same internal system so it doesn't really make sense. Heck the dead soming back itself doesn't either but still. Also, what exacly moves the zombie. I'm still confused on that somewhat. I mean if the body comes back and functions somewhat, than does that mean the virus only reanimates the parts of the body like the muscles to move and whatever else is there. PLease explain a little about that. In another case, if the zombies don't breath so there isn't any air in them so how can they mourn. Also, some people think that zombies still retain some features from their past life. I mean habits like always going to the mall will lead that zombie to the mall they went to before.

I'm only going to say this one time,so 'listen'.
Do you know how a virus works?

[Mugen]

what would we do if it were something like I am legend, or 28 weeks later?
I'd be stealing out of every house.

[moffetto]

what would we do if it were something like I am legend, or 28 weeks later?

sit on my deck with a shotgun and a drink

[Russkie]

Whoa, 6 pages about a fictional event which will never happen!!! That's right. I said it! It had to be said! I said it!

BLASPHEMY! HIERATIC! HEATHEN!



I'd be stealing out of every house.

What about the storage buildings and warehouses? Or the armories, or barracks? And I thought you said this wouldnt happen, why even plan when you dont believe it will happen?



sit on my deck with a shotgun and a drink

You will become a zombie 10 minutes after the apocalypse starts.

[Mugen]

BLASPHEMY! HIERATIC! HEATHEN!



What about the storage buildings and warehouses? Or the armories, or barracks? And I thought you said this wouldnt happen, why even plan when you dont believe it will happen?







There aren't zombies in I Am Legend. Only Mutants. ::D:

[Russkie]

There aren't zombies in I Am Legend. Only Mutants. ::D:

I know that, I saw the movie. We are not talking about mutants here, we are talking about zombies! Zombies are easyer to kill when they are only a few, but almost impossible when they are in full size.

[Mugen]

I was just saying, if I were in the situation Will Smith was in, in I Am Legend I'd be robbing everything!

But if zombies were to attack, I'd go underground. With shottys. ^^

[Russkie]

I was just saying, if I were in the situation Will Smith was in, in I Am Legend I'd be robbing everything!

But if zombies were to attack, I'd go underground. With shottys. ^^

If its easily defendable, like an underground bunker or a ship/platform at sea, then thats a great place to survive during the apocalypse...

But remember: "If there is only one way in, then there is only one way out".

[tennis]

Woah! It's actually possible to happen.
http://65.127.124.62/south_asia/4483241.stm.htm

[Xunlai]

Russkie you never answered me, what would happen if the events i stated happened?

[monsoon 10]

BLASPHEMY! HIERATIC! HEATHEN!


He is going into relapse I suggest somebody get the sedative.

[Xunlai]

He is going into relapse I suggest somebody get the sedative.

lol hahaha, wait relapse? Fudge so he has done this before? wish i coulda seen that

[Shigami]

Woah! It's actually possible to happen.
http://65.127.124.62/south_asia/4483241.stm.htm


Then i guess we have less time than we think..

[Ryuuzaki]

Then i guess we have less time than we think..

I do hope your being sarcastic. You do know that article is fake right? xD

[Shigami]

I do hope your being sarcastic. You do know that article is fake right? xD


I did point out from the very beggining that the 'Zombie Virus' can in fact exist in nature,and it already does...But it's not powerful enough to take over a human mind and therefore a body.

[Russkie]

what would we do if it were something like I am legend, or 28 weeks later?

I have seen "I Am Legend", but not "28 Weeks Later".

If the event "I Am Legend" happened, then things would be a little different seeing as these things not only hunt in packs... but are super powerful and are not like mindless zombies. They think, they coordinate, they fool you by leading you into a false direction of belief.

The best thing to do is to hope you can get to cold terrain ASAP. Of course, bring along whatever supplies you can (Food, guns, medical supplies, ect) and any survivers you may encounter.

[leerock89]

I agree with Mugen. 8 pages on something that won't happen is incredible. But if it does I'm going to say it's going to happen all natural without man intervention, and when it happens I'm going to try to become one so that I can infect more people.

[Russkie]

I agree with Mugen. 8 pages on something that won't happen is incredible. But if it does I'm going to say it's going to happen all natural without man intervention, and when it happens I'm going to try to become one so that I can infect more people.

It will happen, just you wait and see! And I know its going to be caused by man, maybe from a parasite of some sort. Why are you wanting to infect others? Thats kinda a "jerk like" thing to do, yes?

[Mugen]

Russkie, you're my idol. Helping people through events that will not happen. This man deserves his own Wikipedia page! :^)

[Russkie]

Russkie, you're my idol. Helping people through events that will not happen. This man deserves his own Wikipedia page! :^)


http://www.umbrellacorporation.com/home/images/stories/T_Virus.jpg

This says otherwise...

[Mugen]

Yipes! Is that an antidote? or the virus...O_o

[tennis]

Me thinks the virus.0_0

[Xunlai]

The blue one is the virus....green is the antidote....atleast in the movie that is, it could always be different colors or vice versa...

[Russkie]

Yipes! Is that an antidote? or the virus...O_o

That my friend... that is the virus that will bring humanity to its knees.

[Mugen]

Where is it kept? 10 miles below the ground in a very strong safe? I hope...

[Russkie]

Where is it kept? 10 miles below the ground in a very strong safe? I hope...

It has not been made yet, thats why I am warning humanity now... before its too late.

[Mugen]

Oh, now I get you! ^^,

[atomicwarz]

i still say none of this is a real guide. heres my thoughts.

1. prepare. if you have money to spend, or the end is near and you decide to take a loan, build a basement/fortress under your house. youd want it very deep, and large enough to carry as much water and food as you could need for a long time. since its entirely possible for all the water in the world, above and below ground, it means that you will need to make a place that can grow its own food and has a way to recycle water.

2. weapons. im no weapon geek, but youll want a weapon thats as far away from the zombies as possible. if the technology comes soon, or you can make it yourself, make some sentry guns, or remote controlled guns. set these up in key locations above the floor. of course, if zombies have guns that may not help...

3. recon and survailence. since you want to see a zombie but have it not see you, having some ways to recon areas is preffered. so once again, this would be a great time for make-it-yourself pros. making some sort of drone out of a camera and a remote controlled plane or car would allow you easy expendable eyes. just watch your back while your watching through the camera. and dont forget a mini tv on the controller.

4. unknown. the pure fact is that there is no telling how zombie-ism will begin. virus, disease, radiation, aliens, etc., etc.. so youll always want to make your fortress air proof, if possible, nearly impenitrable walls. (who knows. maybe there will be zombie hedgehogs) and of course, try wearing something to keep bugs off. misquitos suck blood. and where else do they get bloods without humans other than zombies. and of course, theyll carry it straight to you if they have a clear shot. also keeping a lab handy if your the smart type wont hurt.

4. free time. youll have not much to do in your secret hideout, unles you feel like watching from the roof all day for a single zombie. that time could be spent either teaching yourself skills. like i said before, making drones or discovering the zombie's habits/natures/infection cause. the last thing you want to have happen is to be on a roof watching for zombie armys, then find out your infected by air.

5. make it memorable. if your the pessimistic type, or the realistic type, you know theres every chance your ass is on a 1 way ride to zombie hell. so using that suicide bomber kit you bought off the internet would be handy. i mean, if your infected you WILL die anyways right? so make it something your fellow zombie escapees wont forget by leaving a small mushroom cloud where 30000 zombies and 1 screwed guy used to be.

6. bullets. we know that bullets will become short supply in a zombie ridden world. so if you have an ammo store or military base nearby, all the better. zombies have the advantage of sheer numbers. of course blades dont lose ammo, but they become dull. and theyre too close raqnge. things such as halkberds and spears would work well, but you better have something to sharpen them. another good thing would be one of those chainsaws on sticks you see people use for branches. but the only sure bet of life is probably finding some army base with its own weapon/ammo factory and a full garrison of soldiers. oh, and dont forget. if your lost in an army base and your being chased, for gods ****ing sake find the tanks. even if its almost out pof gas, its still 7 inches of steel between you and your death.

7. speed. of course, nothing is known how a zombie really will be, but one thing is agreed, they have stamina. ALOT of stamina. so when your running chances are you havnt outrun them. of course, zombies arnt gods. they have limits. they may be almost unkillable, but they arnt superman, so they cant see for 100 miles and through walls. then again, they may have superhuman senses of hearing and speed and such. so basicaly your only safe when a single zombie is on earth, when your dead.

8. mutations. one thing we havnt discussed is zombie mutants. theoreticaly these could grow wings, become strong enough to bring down a building brick by brick (or smash ANY barricade.) or climb walls. (roof dwellers beware.) if this happens theyll probly be best suited for defeating you. so there are several things you could do. it depends on the zombie type and weapons.
smart-fast-gun on hand. zombies who lost no intelligance or speed. getting ibnto a hallway (or another enclosed space) and setting up a shot so it cant dodge would be good. aim for the head. and alot. these bastards dont die. and be prepared for traps, retreats, and al around ****ed-ness
dumb-fast-gun on hand. okay, a bit easier. theyr fast, but theyre dumb as hell. simply find another hallway and gun them down
smart-fast-no gun. okay this is bad. your ****ed probly. your best chance would probably be something for slashing. getting a good stab on a fast moving head wouldnt be easy.
dumb-fast-no gun. ok.... easier, but still hard. were it me id get a kick ass axe, or some other slashing weapon, and bring it down right on its head. bloody fountain time.
dumb-slow-armed with gun. piece of cake. simply get some range, aim for the head, bang. easy shot. of course with mutations the brain may not be in the head. get ready for a game of hide and seek with bullets vs body.
smart-slow-armed with gun. slow ones will likely be strong, or call other zombies. they always have a goddamn trick. like animals in the forest. be prepared for traps, and surprises, but get out of its range and your a-ok.
smart-slow-no gun- once again. maybe tricky. id use something good for a long stab, like a spear. hell get a pointed stick if you must.
dumb-slow-no gun. good n easy... ish. id use another stabbing weapon.

9. OH SHIT. intelligence with a zombie means 1 thing.... weapons. if you see a zombie with guns or chainsaws get the **** away. unless your bulletproof or you can outrun a bullet at 800 mph, then you may be ****ed. remember, zombies bleed. on guns that theyre holding probly. blood gets on bullet, bullet hits you. they say nothing survives the heat of a bullets firing, but id still be careful, especialy if you have blood on you already.

10. happy ending. the only happy ending youll get is your death. my ultimate plane would be to go to the best army base you can, fire nukes at the continent im on, clear it out, and hope im safe. you may kill other survivors, but if your klucky it will become a promised land for other continent's survivors. if not then hey look on the bright side. zombies cant live forever. and if they do then theyll evolve. maybe theyll have their own zombie chrisis. and then whos gonna be laughing it up in the afterlife? "you dumbasses! payback! oh ya! run fatass run! ope! too late! your ass got eaten you ****ing zombie!"

[Russkie]

i still say none of this is a real guide.

You dare question the authority and brilliance of Mary?

[shadowmaks]

Mary? Who the heck is Mary?

[Shigami]

That my friend... that is the virus that will bring humanity to its knees.

Humanity doesn't need a virus to being it to it's knees..we have human's to do that.If we continue our life styles the way they are now,we will be dead before we get to see any zombies.

[Russkie]

Humanity doesn't need a virus to being it to it's knees..we have human's to do that.If we continue our life styles the way they are now,we will be dead before we get to see any zombies.

And who would be making this virus? The humans of course... humanity will destroy itself one way or another - it is in our nature.



Mary? Who the heck is Mary?

Mary is the one who wrote the guide.

[Mugen]

^And who is Mary? Fictional? Dead? Tell, tell!

[Russkie]

^And who is Mary? Fictional? Dead? Tell, tell!

She is a real person as far as I can tell, she posted it in the NPO forums. Thats about all I know about her.

[Mugen]

I see. Okay, cool. What was the response to the Zomebie Survival Guide in the NBO forums?

[Russkie]

I see. Okay, cool. What was the response to the Zomebie Survival Guide in the NBO forums?

*Smack* its the NPO forums...

Lets just say, that the forums are split up like the ones here... Off topic lounge, club spam, debate room, ect. It became so big, it was turned into one of those sections of the forums.

[Bass Test]

You all forgot the most important rule of zombie survival.
"IF YOUR ALONE IN A DARK ROOM LIGHT A MATCH." Zombies will always wait until you see them and attack after the match goes out so shoot them while they are still then run.

[Russkie]

You all forgot the most important rule of zombie survival.
"IF YOUR ALONE IN A DARK ROOM LIGHT A MATCH." Zombies will always wait until you see them and attack after the match goes out so shoot them while they are still then run.

No... they wont... Thats neither important enough to be on the list or true. The fact is, if the zombie(s) notices your food, they will eat you. None of this "oh, well... take your time lighting that match. I want to make sure you see me rip you appart and eat you alive".

[Shigami]

No... they wont... Thats neither important enough to be on the list or true. The fact is, if the zombie(s) notices your food, they will eat you. None of this "oh, well... take your time lighting that match. I want to make sure you see me rip you appart and eat you alive".

Which make's me think that,since they are re-animated yes but still human's..they Cannot see in the dark.They are also weak against fire,lighting,melee-damage,ranged-damage and pretty much have all the weaknesses a human body has.So from the above.

Zombie's = *(Very)* Angry human crowd

[Mugen]

I mostly come on AnimeFuel Forums to check two threads. This one and the 'Who's the hottest anime female?' thread.

[shadowmaks]

I finally figured it out! The reason zombies go after people and not each other is because of warm flesh. They go after the warmest flesh they can find. That would also explain why if there is only one person, that person will be completly devoured while when there are more than one, they eat a little of the first person but than goes for the others. Sorry if this is out of nowhere but I thought I should post it since it wasn't talked about.

[Russkie]

I finally figured it out! The reason zombies go after people and not each other is because of warm flesh. They go after the warmest flesh they can find. That would also explain why if there is only one person, that person will be completly devoured while when there are more than one, they eat a little of the first person but than goes for the others. Sorry if this is out of nowhere but I thought I should post it since it wasn't talked about.

*Sigh* have you not seen the Resident Evil movies? Seriously, go watch all 3 of them and come back here.

Zombies need to eat living meats, not because its warm or anything, but just because its "fresh" I guess you could say.

Stop pondering what makes them do the things they do, and think of the best ways to kill them.



I mostly come on AnimeFuel Forums to check two threads. This one and the 'Who's the hottest anime female?' thread.

I myself check this thread, and anything thats actualy interesting... I would have more post by now, but only if people would actualy come up with something productive/interesting/amusing to talk about!

[shadowmaks]

I have seen all three Re movies and I have played 0,1,2,3,4, Outbreak 2, and Veronica X and beaten 2,3,and 4. I'm just trying to make something to discuss about. Sorry if I'm such a bother to you and everyone else so how about you go to my house to sign a constract that you will be the one to kill me if I turn. Forget that. Just shoot me before the zombies even come. Will that make you happy enough.

[Mugen]

Do you think anyone would be able to re-kill a zombie without any emotional problems? Afterall, they were a human once.

[Shigami]

Do you think anyone would be able to re-kill a zombie without any emotional problems? Afterall, they were a human once.

What do you mean? Oo

[Mugen]

Say a zombie was coming towards you, you have a shotgun in your hand. Would you blow that zombie away without any second thoughts?

[Shigami]

You mean something like this was approching me?
http://www.frightcatalog.com/i/360x360/1001034.jpg

...
I would say hmm..






http://p-images.veoh.com/thumb/w277/user-loser300041.jpg

[Ryuuzaki]

http://p-images.veoh.com/thumb/w277/user-loser300041.jpg

Yeah! FPS Doug ftw! XD He slays all zombies.

[Russkie]

Do you think anyone would be able to re-kill a zombie without any emotional problems? Afterall, they were a human once.

Maybe if it was someone they once knew, then yes.

[shadowmaks]

Maybe its me, but that zombie looks like Jesus Christ

[Mugen]

I suppose in life and death situations, the quick thinker will always prevail.

[Russkie]

I suppose in life and death situations, the quick thinker will always prevail.

Write that down... do it now. That = awesome thinking.

[Mugen]

Why thank you.
Have you seen 'Shaun Of The Dead? It's a ...now let me get this right...'ZomRomCom' (Zombies, romantic comedy).

[Russkie]

Why thank you.
Have you seen 'Shaun Of The Dead? It's a ...now let me get this right...'ZomRomCom' (Zombies, romantic comedy).

Yes, yes I have... and Hot Fuzz. Both movies were pure awsomeness in its true form.

[Mugen]

I thought it would be poking fun at zombie movies, but it's actually really intelligent and witty. Same goes for Hot Fuzz. Got them both on DVD.

[Russkie]

I thought it would be poking fun at zombie movies, but it's actually really intelligent and witty. Same goes for Hot Fuzz. Got them both on DVD.

I'm not sure about you, but I thought Hot Fuzz was better than Shaun of the Dead. Dont get me wrong, Shaun was good... but Hot Fuzz was just awesome.

Now, just so we dont get off track too much: ZOMBIES! Prepare yourself for the worst!

[shadowmaks]

I found an other one similar to Shawn of the Dead. Its not really a movie but more like a short film. Go to youtube and type ZOMBIE MOVIE and look for something that says zombie movie (part 1). One of the actors look and sound really similar to the actor that played Shawn. The first two parts are about three rock punks traped in their own car and what they do to get by day by day. The rest of the parts I have not seen.

[Mugen]

I found an other one similar to Shawn of the Dead. Its not really a movie but more like a short film. Go to youtube and type ZOMBIE MOVIE and look for something that says zombie movie (part 1). One of the actors look and sound really similar to the actor that played Shawn. The first two parts are about three rock punks traped in their own car and what they do to get by day by day. The rest of the parts I have not seen.You're talking about 'Danger: 10,000 Volts!'. I posted that video on the front page (I think), sir. :)

[Russkie]

You're talking about 'Danger: 10,000 Volts!'. I posted that video on the front page (I think), sir. :)

50,000 actualy, but yes - it was you.

[Mugen]

Ah, yes, 50,000. :p

It's funny. Simon Pegg has big teeth in it. xD

[Ryuuzaki]

Whatever happened to just grabbing a torch and chucking it at a zombie and letting it burn? Doesn't anyone do that anymore? :serious:

[Mugen]

Not unless you have got a sword/knife attatched to that flaming object.

[Russkie]

Whatever happened to just grabbing a torch and chucking it at a zombie and letting it burn? Doesn't anyone do that anymore? :serious:

Again >.<, rule number 29: "If you can see a zombie, it is far too close."

Meaning, dont risk meleeing zombies... the best way to not get bitten is to try your very best to stay away from zombies. Yes, I know, you will run into them no matter what, but my point is to at least try and keep a safe distance.

I am starting to wonder if anyone is/has actually read(ing) the darn guide!

[Mugen]

Again >.<, rule number 29: "If you can see a zombie, it is far too close."

Meaning, dont risk meleeing zombies... the best way to not get bitten is to try your very best to stay away from zombies. Yes, I know, you will run into them no matter what, but my point is to at least try and keep a safe distance.

I am starting to wonder if anyone is/has actually read(ing) the darn guide!Would it be a safe choice to barracade yourself into a small fortress-esque house with more than one exit?

[Russkie]

Would it be a safe choice to barracade yourself into a small fortress-esque house with more than one exit?

Rule 13: "No place is safe; only safer. While being in a place with only one way out has its perks, it also means there will still only be one way out when the zombies come streaming through the door."

Does that answer your question?

[Mugen]

Rule 13: "No place is safe; only safer. While being in a place with only one way out has its perks, it also means there will still only be one way out when the zombies come streaming through the door."

Does that answer your question?

From what I gathered from that rule, yes, it is a great idea to have a fortified house with more than one exit.

[Russkie]

From what I gathered from that rule, yes, it is a great idea to have a fortified house with more than one exit.

*Claps hands* Yay! You got it! Just dont have too many exits... and dont for one second you are safe. If you drop your guard then you yourself will get droped.

[Mugen]

It'd be a great idea to have that exit hidden from the outside. A zombie knows what a door is, only because of its except features. So it'd be great to paint over it using paint the same colour of the wall it's attached to.

[Gerbil-Man]

i got the offical zombie survival guide, by max brooks fot 11 dollars at barns and nobles

[puppetz]

me and my friend already have a plan. go to the local gunstore. go to the local super market. and then meet in his basement and post up. we have all exits covered and he has xbox live. besides he also has a crazy attack spider.

[Mugen]

Hey Russkie, what if you punched a zombie and your hand gets covered by the infected blood? Can the blood seep into your pores and kill you?

[Russkie]

Hey Russkie, what if you punched a zombie and your hand gets covered by the infected blood? Can the blood seep into your pores and kill you?

Well, your body does absorb things... but I highly doubt it. Now if its on an open wound, then thats a different story.

[Mugen]

If it's an open wound, you're screwed.
http://image.hazardstrip.com/ico/sprays/funny-pictures-zombie-survival-kit.png
That won't even help you.

[Tarkinor]

Its kind of the same thoughts as with some STDs, note im only using that as a reference, dont freak out on me lol. With some of them, such as Aids, if you got the blood in through and open wound, you have a very high chance of getting Aids, with zombies its probably around a 99.9% chance of getting it from having the blood come in, now with it going in supposedly through your pores, the chance would be next to none, mostly because the amount of the virus that could possibly get into the blood veins would be so small and weak it would be annhialated by your white blood cells.

[Russkie]

Its kind of the same thoughts as with some STDs, note im only using that as a reference, dont freak out on me lol. With some of them, such as Aids, if you got the blood in through and open wound, you have a very high chance of getting Aids, with zombies its probably around a 99.9% chance of getting it from having the blood come in, now with it going in supposedly through your pores, the chance would be next to none, mostly because the amount of the virus that could possibly get into the blood veins would be so small and weak it would be annhialated by your white blood cells.

An interesting way to put things... But I guess it makes sense (I think).

[Shigami]

Its kind of the same thoughts as with some STDs, note im only using that as a reference, dont freak out on me lol. With some of them, such as Aids, if you got the blood in through and open wound, you have a very high chance of getting Aids, with zombies its probably around a 99.9% chance of getting it from having the blood come in, now with it going in supposedly through your pores, the chance would be next to none, mostly because the amount of the virus that could possibly get into the blood veins would be so small and weak it would be annhialated by your white blood cells.


You forgot one thing..White blood cells do not attack all kind of viruses > .>

[Tovarishch]

I feel like I MUST take this phenomenal opportunity to make an obvious necrophilia joke.
But, I will instead resist.
Must...
Resist...






...This is more difficult than I thought.
-Tovarishch

[Russkie]

*Uses his amazing and awesome powers to resurect this deceased thread*

Probably wont do any good, but I might as well try...

[Kenshy]

I feel like I MUST take this phenomenal opportunity to make an obvious necrophilia joke.
But, I will instead resist.
Must...
Resist...






...This is more difficult than I thought.
-Tovarishch
You feel you "MUST" take this opportunity to make a necrophilia joke, but you don't? What's the point? I MUST not post this. Must resist...

[Russkie]

How pointless. You feel you "MUST" take this opportunity to make a necrophilia joke, but you don't? What's the point? I MUST not post this. Must resist...

The hell kind of question is that? Of course I do!

But seriously, read the guide. Might save your life one day.

[Kenshy]

The hell kind of question is that? Of course I do!

But seriously, read the guide. Might save your life one day.Either you have inadvertently admitted to being 'Tovarishch', or you misread what I posted.

[Russkie]

Either you have inadvertently admitted to being 'Tovarishch', or you misread what I posted.

I see... Yes, I thought you said something about vodka.

[Kenshy]

I see... Yes, I thought you said something about vodka. I did, but edited it, because..well, I love Vodka.

[Russkie]

I did, but edited it, because..well, I love Vodka.

Well that makes sense, I guess I clicked the quote button at the wrong time.

But for some reason, I thought that last part about the vodka was directed to me. Bah...

[Kenshy]

Well that makes sense, I guess I clicked the quote button at the wrong time.

But for some reason, I thought that last part about the vodka was directed to me. Bah...

Not you, the 'other' Soviet human.

[Russkie]

Not you, the 'other' Soviet human.

I realize this now.

I dont really like that idiot child either, too much self pride.

[Kenshy]

I realize this now.

I dont really like that idiot child either, too much self pride.I can tell he is egotistical simply because he leaves his UserName at he bottom of every post he makes.

[Russkie]

I can tell he is egotistical simply because he leaves his UserName at he bottom of every post he makes.

I know right? What kind of loser does that?

-Russkie.

(lol)

[Kenshy]

I know right? What kind of loser does that?

-Russkie.

(lol)Good call.

-Kenshy.

Edit: Back on topic: Chances of zombie outbursts are?

[Russkie]

Good call.

-Kenshy.

Edit: Back on topic: Chances of zombie outbursts are?

Higher than you could imagine. As we speak, scientists are playing God by mixing unstable chemicals together to make a super T-virus capable of reanimating dead cells.

[lemonek]

The dumbest thing to do during a zombie attack is to trust each other to do the right thing

[Artamis]

I have to agree with Lemonek, the human survival instinct is quiet strong. A person can become a totally different person when faced with death, your closest friend can become your worst enemy......you will need to look out for only yourself when faced with zombies.

[Russkie]

I have to agree with Lemonek, the human survival instinct is quiet strong. A person can become a totally different person when faced with death, your closest friend can become your worst enemy......you will need to look out for only yourself when faced with zombies.

Meh, you're right and wrong. It is true that your survival instincts will kick into full gear (if you've got any), and you will become a different person (and by different, that might include being dead).

But you will need allies, they are key to survival. Yes, you probably wont get along with everyone. And there will be some skirmishes between those who deem themselves worthy enough to be the alpha. But there are plenty of excellent reasons why forming survival groups during the zombie apocalypse is vital.

Example: You may not know how to fix that truck/APC/tank, but your newly found buddy "John Doe" who was once a mechanic might be able to.

Example: The broken ankle you just got after escaping from that horde of zombies could have really gotten you into trouble. Good thing "Jane Doe" was a Doctor before the outbreak.

All in all, you need other people who have not been infected to survive.

[lemonek]

Yeah, help is always useful, but as on the guide says there are some knowing it all people that screw things up, yep ditch them.

Like it is said:

I beware of my friends and stay away from my enemies.