View Full Version : my stupid poetry =.=
12-19-2008, 03:49 AM
Loves memory has traced our outline in this place.
But will the spider remember, or the sun?
Did the water capture our faces in permanence?
Does the wind create us anew as it blows?
Did the shadows from the trees record our passage beneath them?
Our secret been revealed.
Yet I have told no other.
I write these words in silence, in mute testimony
To what once was.
But our image remains alive in this place.
It can not be removed.
We saw the day and hoped for tomorrow.
We caught a brief glimpse of love's promise.
We were not liars,
But thieves of time.
For now time has now forgotten us,
Yet our memory lingers, and love remembers
This place that was ours.
I'm a Bitch
12-19-2008, 03:51 AM
i like it... i like it alot. it really makes me stop and think
12-19-2008, 05:41 AM
Don't be so hard on yourself...in the form of words, madness, despite what you may think, is still poetry. So, if insanity was what you were aiming for, then i'd have to say
"JoB WeLL DoNe!!"
12-19-2008, 05:47 AM
Considering it was pretty odd it worked for this. Good job.
Btw, another cat? How many angry cats been lobbed at your face?
I'm a Bitch
12-19-2008, 05:54 AM
when i voted good in some strange way...
mark out the "in some strange way..." part. i like poems and trust me... that was good
12-19-2008, 09:10 AM
it's really good i liked it ^^
12-19-2008, 07:20 PM
It's a really nice poem! I really liked the "Thieves of time" part.
12-19-2008, 09:24 PM
*stunned by amazingness*
12-20-2008, 05:26 PM
O.O" that was really gud..idk wat u is talking bout..that is WAY better than i could ever do..
*claps* keep it up:D
02-22-2009, 03:26 PM
WONDERFUL! It was SO not confusing and if it was (even though I still don't think so) then ... nobody has the right to criticize the "confusing" part of the poem because well, YOU'RE the artist in this situation and tell me: Do the most AWESOME poets really say what they mean? OR do they write "confusing" poems to make you think? :P
Anyways, getting to the point. I thought the poem was FANTASTIC and it wasn't confusing it was Unique and obviously your opinion although I agree with your words ;)
I'm gonna be a fan ^-^ I'm expecting more good work from you. Don't disappoint me. =]
02-25-2009, 05:43 AM
good thought but i think u chopped it up to short ,,,,, maybe add some more critical points ...... but the thought was good and i'm not being sarcastic either
02-25-2009, 08:04 PM
its really is an good poem and it rhymes alot i really like it
02-25-2009, 08:08 PM
deep thats all i can say
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